And come to think of it, there is more to that. I’m not sure if it’s living in New York City, but since I’ve moved here I feel like I have been caught up in a vicious cycle- wanting, needing, not having, wanting more, spending, wanting again- and while in the last two weeks I haven’t left that cycle (at all, really), I feel like God has entered into it with me. Not necessarily commenting, just observing, just present with me in those thoughts. Previously, I think I specifically kept God out of any thoughts or conversations that had to do with my personal materialism (of course in more desperate financial jams, I would shoot up a plea “FIX THIS?!”) maybe because I thought I would feel judged or convicted. But I have to say that this subtle entrance of God into my previously “private sphere” has been accompanied by surprisingly little guilt. I honestly feel like He’s just checking it out, glad to have been invited in. While I am still in the vicious cycle I feel I have gained the slightest, almost imperceptible ability to see the cycle from the outside looking in. Is that possible? While God is checking out things from your perspective, does He allow you a glimpse from His?
Anyway, I feel like something is about to happen. Not sure what it is, but my first report from the trenches is- something’s brewing. And I like that.
ps. I know a few other people have also recently began their own resolutions to tithe. Any updates? Stories for your side of things?
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